I have to admit, being in real estate gives me the opportunity to laugh daily.  This one was worth sharing.  While searching through Chicago properties on the MLS and the photos of condos for a client, I came across the following photos :

So, how much are they asking for the picture and the rug?  It is obvious that the real estate agent who posted these images isn’t able to market a condo effectively.

I’ve written before about the deplorable photographs that some agents use on their listings but these photos of a short sale loft deserve a prize. I’ve seen people joke about realtors shooting photos with their cell phones on some of the real estate blogs but I never thought that really happened. Apparently so:

This shot of the living room shows you what the room will look like after consuming the Skyy Vodka shown in the kitchen photo.

The agent liked this shot of the kitchen so much that he put it on the MLS twice. The staging is priceless, with the towel wrapped around the refrigerator door, the garbage can in the corner, and the dishwashing soap in the kitchen sink. These are nice touches because they show that the kitchen is barely large enough to fit the garbage can and people can see that the sink is to be used for washing dishes. The Skyy vodka is to the left of the refrigerator.

This photo highlights the natural light available at night.

In general, short sales have the worst photos. Who knows how the banks come up with the agents to handle these and I can assure you that the bureaucracy of a bank would make it near impossible for a capable realtor to take business from these amateurs. Is it any wonder that the banks are losing their asses on these properties and need the taxpayers to bail them out?

There is apparently no limit as to how stupid some real estate agents can be. Or maybe they just don’t care. One of my pet peeves is the outrageously awful service/marketing that some real estate agents provide – especially on foreclosures or short sales. In addition to not answering the phone or returning phone calls there is a pattern of using really awful photos. It’s one thing to take your own photos (we do not) but these realtors are really bad photographers:

• Pictures taken with cell phone cameras
• Poor lighting
• Out of focus
• Center on the wrong thing

The last point is my favorite, of which there are numerous examples. For instance, it is fairly typical to see pictures of floors or corners of rooms as in this picture below for a condo in Bronzeville (it took me less than 3 minutes to find a picture like this).

With absolutely no perspective on the room, it’s not at all clear what attributes the realtor is trying to highlight. The dirty carpet? The abandoned phone in the closet?

However, nothing compares to this photo found for a listing in Riverside, CA, which quickly became an Internet sensation because of the contents of the toilet, which were not pixelated in the original listing.

I first learned about it in the comments section for a post on Cribchatter and it was originally part of this listing from Redfin. Now if you go to the Redfin listing link you will no longer find this photo because apparently they eventually figured out that they were drawing the wrong kind of attention to the listing. Fortunately Dr. Housing Bubble preserved the photo for posterity and had the good sense to pixelate the contents of the toilet. I might not have been so sensitive.

So let’s give this realtor the benefit of the doubt. Maybe the water had been turned off and the toilet couldn’t be flushed. But then why isn’t the lid closed? I see pictures of toilets all the time in the MLS (but not dirty) and it always fascinates me that a) they took the picture of the toilet in the first place and b) they left the lid open.

The bottom line: if your home is currently for sale you should run to the nearest computer to find out if your realtor is highlighting your toilet.